Wednesday, November 3, 2010

What's going to happen next?

As many of you know, a few months ago I quit the rat race and found myself in a new home and alone in said home with a crazy, screaming toddler who has reached the terrible twos quite a few months before he's arrived at the ripe old age...oh...and a growing belly full of baby-love.

Have you noticed that I don't have as much to write of said fetus (A-Rob is what I think the blogosphere will know him as), as I did with little J-Dawg? I think because everything with Little J was so new to me. Now the throwing up for the entire 9 month period, gestational diabetes, extreme fatigue etc, etc, etc seem quite normal to me and I've come to terms with the fact that none of my pregnancies are going to be "easy," not that any pregnancy really is easy (except for you b!@%(&*$ who have really easy pregnancies, I'll never like you - I'm sorry).

There are a few things that are different this time bed rest, reasonably low blood pressure (I'm doing BIG knocks on wood for those first two), actually feeling the fetus sit on my bladder (I guess bed rest had its advantages) and the constant need for little A-Rob to do 360's while I'm trying to walk. I can't tell you how many times I've almost fallen flat on my face because this kid wants to wiggle while I walk.

Also, a big difference is running around after a toddler and spending my days watching Elmo, coloring with crayons, play dates, swinging at the park and cuddling up to a nice theatrical reading of "The Cat in the Hat." We seem to be settling into this little routine called Stay-At-Home-Mommy-Hood little J and I. It wasn't easy at first - getting used to being together all the time - but it seems like J-Dawg and mommy are growing fond of each other and becoming partners in crime.

Now all I have to ask myself is...what's going to happen in approximately 8 weeks when another little man comes in and mixes up our groove? Things are going to be different and I don't know whether J-Dawg or I know what is going to hit us.

Each night J-Dawg and I have story time and singing time. As I lay my little fella down to sleep, if there is even a one second delay in songs, he emphatically demands I "SING." He even asked me to "SING" while we were shopping in the grocery store the other day. This kid melts my heart on a daily basis. Tonight while we were singing he turned and looked at me with the look only a son gives to his mommy, wrapped his arms around me and gave me the cuddliest hug I've ever gotten from him.

They say your heart expands when you have another child. I hope and pray it's true, because J-Dawg has captured mine completely and I would hate not having enough room for little A-Rob because I know he's special. I can feel his little spirit entering my heart already. It will definitely be a new challenge and a whole new way of being - but I think I'm ready.